On condition that it may be so troublesome to find a therapist today (not to mention a great one), it’s tempting to think about double dipping in the event you’re in {couples} remedy but additionally on the lookout for particular person assist, or vice-versa. However can a therapist see a pair individually for one-on-one remedy?
Technically, sure. There’s no legislation in opposition to your {couples} therapist doubling as your particular person therapist, says Dana M. Harris, LMFT, who treats people and {couples}. Nonetheless, “that is sometimes an moral battle,” Harris says. “Most of us are skilled that this isn’t a greatest observe and there are many explanation why.”
That mentioned, there are some circumstances the place having your {couples} therapist additionally serving as your particular person therapist could also be helpful. However there’s a whole lot of nuance round this matter to unpack—and explanation why therapists won’t be into the thought in any respect.
When a therapist shouldn’t see {couples} individually for remedy
As Harris talked about, there are fairly a number of circumstances by which it wouldn’t be moral or advisable to your {couples} therapist to be your particular person therapist.
For instance, it’s a nasty thought when the therapist is simply seeing one particular person within the relationship (versus everybody concerned). “If a therapist is seeing one particular person from the couple individually, it may be arduous—whilst a therapist—to ensure that they’re not biased,” says Harris. In any case, they’re listening to much more about one particular person than the opposite particular person or individuals within the relationship.
“If a therapist is seeing one particular person from the couple individually, it may be arduous—whilst a therapist—to ensure that they’re not biased.” —Dana M. Harris, LMFT
And if it’s arduous for a licensed therapist to verify their biases, think about what it could be wish to the one who isn’t receiving particular person remedy from this supplier. “It’s arduous for the opposite particular person within the couple to actually consider that the therapist isn’t taking sides,” Harris says, which could impression the result or efficacy of the {couples} remedy classes. (For instance, you may be much less receptive to suggestions or workouts advised by the therapist in the event you really feel such as you’re not getting a good shake through the group classes.)
There’s additionally a problem of confidentiality, says particular person and {couples} therapist Anthony Phillips, AMFT. “As therapists, we all the time adhere to a secrecy coverage, that means that no matter is talked about throughout particular person remedy has to remain in that session so far as the therapist is anxious.” When your therapist is treating you and the couple you’re in, it instantly challenges a therapists’ capability to take care of that secrecy coverage, Phillips provides.
Additionally, we’d be remiss to not level out that when therapists are treating people, that singular particular person is their shopper. “However after we’re treating a pair, the connection is our shopper,” Harris says. What Harris means by that is that the therapist is not going to deal with any session as one accomplice versus one other accomplice. Surely, it’s all companions versus the argument, challenge, battle—you get the purpose. This strategy helps forestall individuals from experiencing perceived biases and retains them on the identical collaborative web page.
For all of those causes, not one of the therapists we spoke to deal with people separate from their {couples} counseling. “I’ve labored with {couples} who determine to cease remedy and I’ll proceed seeing one member of the couple as a person, however I ensure that they perceive that we can’t return to {couples} remedy as soon as that occurs,” says Harris, referencing the hazards of perceived biases.
Is it ever okay to get particular person remedy out of your {couples} therapist?
That mentioned, there are some situations the place it may be useful to your {couples} therapist to double as your private therapist. The most typical prevalence for that is earlier than you absolutely decide to {couples} remedy, says intercourse therapist and licensed scientific social employee Chanta Blue, LCSW.
“That is useful for the therapist as a result of we’re capable of get a full background historical past of every particular person within the relationship,” Blue says. She provides that this will likely additionally present a possibility for one accomplice to totally specific how they really feel with out worrying about hurting individuals’s emotions.
It may additionally be useful for people to individually get remedy from their {couples} counselor in the event that they’re having a tough time speaking of their {couples} session, says Phillips. “If the couple is unstable in session and so they do not do effectively speaking with one another, getting a narrative from each views could be helpful if you carry it to {couples} remedy,” he says.
This therapeutic double-dipping may additionally be helpful in ensuring that the objectives of the couple and respective people are aligned, says Harris. Say that one of many individuals within the relationship is engaged on their defensiveness. “When that’s developing within the couple’s session, it is a lot simpler if the identical therapist is aware of that [and handles it in individual sessions],” she says.
TL;DR: You can have the identical therapist for your self as you do for {couples} counseling—however you’d wish to ensure that all the individuals within the relationship are seeing the therapist individually with the intention to forestall perceived biases.
And, bear in mind, if you and your accomplice(s) combat, it’s infrequently you versus them. Surely, it’s y’all versus the issue—so proceed accordingly.
#Therapist #Couple #Individually